Monday, May 22, 2006
Day Number Fifteen
Today will be my fifteenth day ay work, which is a bit of along stretch for me. It feels even longer for J.R. and probly doesn't help her stress and panic attacks. At least today I get to go back to my normal scheduled shift. It was okay working on first shift. That is if I liked having your retinas burned to a crisp every time I went outside. I spent most of my time with my tinted safety glasses on, which have apparently lightened up since the last time I work day shift. When ever I stepped outside I had to put my clip-on shades on top of the safety glasses.The traffic at five in the morning around here isn't too bad. I was able to hit all but one green light on most days. On sunday morning no one was out, not even the christians. It was so nice, I didn't have to make a single stop for twelve miles. Every light was green, the pavement was dry, and no yellow caution flags to be seen. No one was looking, so I drove it like it was Leguna Seca. Taking corners in third gear, using the engine's own compression to slow me down instead of hitting the brakes. Cutting it as close to the curb as I could. It felt good, kind of relaxing. It probly would have looked good too, but then again, I was driving my rusty Ranger.
At four thousand RPM it sounds less of a high speed road race machine, and more like a machine gun shooting b.b.'s into a empty coffee can. I think it was something to do with the missing three feet of tail pipe, the two inch crack at the hanger bracket, and the blown exhaust manifold gasket. That's just a guess though. Hopefully, I'll have more time to fix all of that stuff pretty soon.
Now it's time to try and catch up on all the things I have not had time to do. Like mow the lawn, which I last cut two weeks ago. With all the rain we have had other the last week, it's growing pretty fast. But first I have to find all the poop that the wonder twins left for me. I still have to finish off the hole where I pulled out a sixteen foot pole with a hunk of cement the size of half a 55 gallon drum. Fun, fun, fun.
greasemonkey1320 at 10:49 AM
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Don't Mess with Texas...Oh I think I Shall.
On occasion I have the privilege of dealing with people who don't not normally reside in this country. More specifically, Canadians and Texans. Yes, that's right, I said Texans. Oh, Texas isn't a foreign country you say. I beg to differ. Have you ever met anyone form there? I have, lots of them. I've even been to Texas, and let me tell you there is something seriously wrong with these people. They are akin to the finest French stereotypes. Bad hygiene, arrogant attitudes, and a shitty accent that makes it impossible to understand them. The key differences being that the French are famous for wine and cheese, and Texas is liberally soaked with beer and tequila. If Texas was known for it's cheese it would probly smell like barbecue and make your asshole burn.The original intent of this post was not to rag on foreigners, but to ridicule the incompetent clowns that I have had to deal with. Persons that were hired to perform a task that is their "profession". I mean if you are going to offer your services for hire you should be able to complete the task. From beginning to end. This is also the key reason that I don't like to hire outside contractors, unless it is absolutely mandatory. They come in, half ass a bunch of shit, then high tail it out of there. Leaving you with a huge mess to deal with and your wallet a lot lighter.
On a side note, I discovered that one of the guys I am dealing with is actually from Wisconsin. Plus one for him. Then I find out he is Polish. Minus one for him. I should of known. The other guy...still from Texas ... still smells like ass.
greasemonkey1320 at 9:00 PM
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Damn, where'd all these dust bunnies come from?!?
It's been a while since the last time I did much around here. I'm surprised there aren't any cobwebs hanging around. Time for the spring cleaning I guess. That's where a lot of my free time has been spent, trying to finish some of the projects that I have going on. Putting up the ceiling in the garage, cleaning up the yard, consolidating my firewood collection, getting J.R.'s truck cleaned up so we can sell it, counter-acting puppy damage in the backyard, making plans for remodeling parts of the house, and having the sewer lines augered out. A vain attempt to organize all the stuff the I have accumulated over the winter.Today, I got to experience the cleaning of the lines the run to the sewer in our house. Yeah, it was fucking nasty, and yes, I called Roto-Rooter and had them do it. I figured it would be best to let a professional handle it this time. They have the proper tools to do the job, that and you never know what you're gonna find in those drains. It seems that we had a large blockage of this black greasy substance in the line off of the kitchen and laundry room. About twenty feet worth topped off with about five pounds of spaghetti from the garbage disposal. The spaghetti was still in four to six inch long chunks, add that to soap scum, lint from laundry and whatever the hell else was in there, and whammo, total stoppage of water flow to the sewer line. If you have never smelled the stench from decaying material in your drains, consider yourself lucky. Two and a half hours and $178 later we once again have free flowing drains. Moral of this story? Don't put spaghetti down the garbage disposal, the garbage bill is cheaper than Roto- Rooter.
On a better note, I finally got most of the ceiling in the garage done. I put up OSB on the roof rafters and put up some two foot high walls above the ceiling. Kind of like a little attic. It's a good place for me to store all of my light weight auto parts, air filters, hoses, gasket sets, and oil filters. No heavy stuff though, whoever lived here before put three or four hundred pounds of lumber on top of the rafters right in the center of the garage. Not a good idea. On the under side of the rafters I put up some ceiling tiles. Just little one square foot tiles that I got from a guy I work with. It looks a lot better now. Cleaner, brighter, and as J.R. puts it, less places for spiders to hide. All I have left to do is put up some covers over the fluorescent lights, and that will pretty much finish of the ceiling.
We have been trying to grow grass where the pool used to be, but it's not going so well. I think UFO's have been coming down and digging holes in my yard. It has to be aliens, because I know these two wouldn't do such a thing. Yeah right. I have to keep back filling the holes with their own poop so they will stop digging. It works really well, until they move to another spot. Something tells me I'm going to end up with a yard that just has a sub layer of poop six inches below the top soil. My neighbors will be so jealous. My lawn will be the envy of the neighborhood. When they ask me what my secret is I'll tell them I water it by peeing on it every day. That would be kind of funny to see though, all my neighbors standing outside all weekend long pissing on their lawns, and I bet some of them are dumb enough to do it too.
Hmm, that was odd. While doing the spellcheck on this post, it suggested that I replace UFO's with wife's and peeing with penis. Man, who the hell writes these spellcheck progams anyway?
greasemonkey1320 at 1:10 AM